Miracles happen when we least expect..

I sit here at 11:35 at night unable to sleep. I've got the music playing but Lucy's snoring seems to drown it out. And you know what? It doesn't bother me one bit. I looked at a lot of old pictures tonight, reminisced a little. I miss the "good ole days" but man I love exactly where my life is at this point. I've never been so sure of who I am and what I want as I am at this time in life. I remember wondering if I would ever find myself, what it is I wanted out of life, whether I could be happy alone, so many things. As I self-reflect tonight, as I often do, I've realized I could not be more proud of the individual I am today.

If there is one thing I learned in life, it's this: get yourself a dog. My life changed in May of 2008, the day I was given Lucy. My life was a wreck and she entered it at exactly the right time. By no means was I ready for my own dog, but I had no choice. This dog became attached to my side. You never saw me without her. We rode everywhere together. I took her walking and running with me. She even came with me to do laundry. I spent almost every minute of the day with her for the first 3 months I had her. I taught her how to shake, sit, fetch, "tip toe", and attack. Her favorite movie was "Dirty Dancing". I figured that out by playing it for her to drown out her screaming when we left her alone. It did more than drown it out, it stopped it. I learned how to deal with her illness by educating myself. I learned all her movements to indicate she needed to potty. I even learned her favorite thing was food. I was by no means experienced in raising a dog but it was a learning process.

When I think about my future as a teacher, I'm scared to death about how I'll do. It's a scary thought to know parents of children with disabilities will be putting their child's educational experience in my hands. I don't want to fail them, because they have so many other things they are dealing with and this should be the least of their worries. But then I compare it to raising Lucy. In the beginning, I won't be prepared or really even know a thing. However, with experience and time, it will all come naturally. Teaching is a process of trial and error. Much like raising Lucy, much like life. We only learn once we've experienced.

Benjamin Franklin stated it best when he said "Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn." This could not be more true. In life, we can tell individuals all day long how to do something or what to do about something but they won't retain it until they have experienced it. Experience is the key to growing up, maturing, knowledge, wisdom. Without our experiences, we would not be the people we are today. I've had many experiences, good and bad, that have influenced who I am. Some of my best experiences were out on the softball field. Some of my worst were in disappointing people I loved. Regardless, I've grown from them all. And, Lucy has grown from her's as well.

It's almost exactly 4 years since I got the greatest gift/lesson of my life. I often use to wonder why Lucy? Why did I get her at a time in my life when I was so unstable, so vulnerable, so weak? But four years later I realized Lucy was brought into my life to pick me up off the ground. She was here to make me strong again. She was here to open my eyes to the beauty in my life. I appreciate my life so much more because of her. I had everything I ever needed right in front of me. And, it took her to make me realize I didn't need to search for happiness because I already had it. The dog means the world to me and I'm so thankful I get to travel down my life journey with the greatest companion I could ever ask for.

Until next time, it's just the two of us..

The first week I had Lucy

Who could not love her?!

My miracle

Happy National Siblings Day!

Apparently today is National Siblings Day. So, I will take the time to write about the amazing siblings I've been bless with. I've been blessed with two amazing sisters who have always been there for me. God has blessed them each with a husband, who have turned out to be pretty awesome brother-in-laws. And last but not least, Daniel is my brother from another mother. Without this boy, I don't know where I would be in life.

First, it's crazy when I think about how far my sisters and I have come. Growing up, we were blessed to have a great childhood. We often took the life we lived for granted simply because we were too young to understand just how lucky we were. My dad was always out in the yard pushing us to become awesome softball players, and he did a great job. We use to get so aggravated at him for making us practice all the time, but it all paid off and we can look back and thank him for it all. My mom was always making us do household chores that we hated more than anything. Looking back, thank God she did because we all know how to live our life independently now. I won't sugar coat it, my sisters and I fought all the time; me and Brandi more so than Marci. But, with age comes wisdom and we have all grown so much. I look at the lives my sisters live and I'm so proud of what they have made out of themselves. Both have college degrees, hold prestigious jobs, and living a comfortable life. One day soon, I will be in the same boat.

Then there are my crazy brother-in-laws. I couldn't ask for better guys for my sisters to marry. Not only did I gain the two of them as brother-in-laws but I also gained two more families. I can always depend on Landon and his brother Jordan to keep me laughing with all their hilarious comments. They've showed me there's nothing better than riding the back roads while listening to country music, and I'm thankful for it. When I think of Mckewn and his brother Travis, I can't help but think back to 2009 and the fun we had at the wedding reception. Mckewn helped strengthen Brandi and I's relationship and has always held his arms wide open for me, and I'm forever grateful. Now, as far as crazy T, that boy brings so much joy to my life. I can't remember what life was like without Travis and his craziness. I'll never forget almost wondering to Cherrie's the night before Marci's wedding. Good times, my friend, good times.

Lastly but not least, there is Daniel. It's funny how life works out. I knew this boy all throughout high school and community college, however we were never close even though we shared a huge amount of mutual friends. It wasn't until I went through a life-altering event that he text me to tell me he was there if I needed. We have been inseparable ever since. He has always been there when I needed him, given me advice that always helped, and loved me unconditionally regardless. He has changed my life for the better and I will never be able to repay the favor for just how much he impacted my life. There's nothing I wouldn't do for this boy. We've had our ups and downs but have managed to survive every challenge. There's that saying "God made us best friends because our mothers would not have been able to handle us together." I feel that could not be more true with us. There's always a good time to be had whether it's a fun night out on the town, sitting at the bar sharing our day over an ice cold beer, or sitting on the couch watching t.v. We always know how to have a good time and it's insane the amount of joy he brings to my life.

I know I say this often but I truly can't thank God enough for the life and family he blessed me with. I see so many people who are not as fortunate as myself, and I just wish they knew what it felt like to be loved like I do. Maybe one day they will. I pray for that anyway. The best advice I can give is tell the people you love just how much you love them because tomorrow isn't promised. Life is too short to not enjoy it. Embrace the people within your life worth embracing and love the life you live.

Brandi, Marci and myself

Travis and Mckewn 

Jordan, Marci and Landon

My sweet Daniel

Until next time, it's just the two of us..

"You said we could change the world, and I believe you.."

I sit here on this dreary yet beautiful Wednesday finding any excuse in the world to delay my homework. I've never been that type of student before but I've definitely been a procrastinator this semester. This past weekend I made a trip home to see the family and of course road trips get me thinking about my life. There is nothing more relaxing than getting in a car and driving for miles, listening to music, and doing some self-reflecting. During this trip, I thought about the people in my life who have helped shape me into the human being I am today.

First, the most important people who have helped shaped me would be my parents. They have instilled morals and values into my sisters and I that a lot of today's generation lacks. I'm by no means perfect but I do believe I'm a well-rounded young lady. They have always supported us no matter what. They have always made sure we learned the lesson in every mistake and recognized the reward in every accomplishment. They didn't give us everything we wanted. They taught us what hard work is and that it does pay off. I don't know where I would be without my parents, and I don't want to think about it.

Secondly, my sisters have always been there for me. Sure, we were hellians growing up and we fought all the time. But, we have grown to be each other's best friend. I know when all else fails, I can turn to my sisters and they will be there in a heartbeat. Even though we all three live in different cities, they are only a phone call away. Brandi taught me and Marci everything we shouldn't do, of course by doing it first. Haha. I'm glad I had an older sister to look up to and teach me about life. She gave me advice about college and softball. She warned me of things to stay away from, even though I often tested those waters. She was and is always there when I need her. I often try to imagine my life not as a twin and I don't know what it would be like. People always tell me how cool it is to be a twin and truth is, unless they are one, they really have no idea JUST how cool it is! Marci knows all my secrets and I know all of hers. I know when I need someone to talk to, she is the one. Marci may have never had the brains, because I stole all of them, but she ended up with the creativeness and life skills. My sisters are talented in their own ways and I strive to be just as talented and influential.

Thirdly, I truly have some of the greatest friends in the world. They have always accepted me just the way I am. They have supported me regardless of the stupid decisions I may have made. They bring the fun and craziness to my life. They are all complete opposites of myself and that's why we all mesh so well. They are my second family and there's nothing I wouldn't do for them. They have taught me so much about myself. Having Jake surprise me last night was one of the greatest surprises. Something so simple yet so fulfilling. I didn't realize the extent of how much I missed him until I saw him last night and that goes for the all the friends that don't live close to me. Growing up isn't fun and saying goodbye is even worse but regardless of the miles, each and everyone of my friends have a special place in my heart. Our lives have all crossed path for a reason, and God has been more than generous with leading me to all these special people I call my friends.

Lastly, I credit a lot of my growing up, maturing, and personal acceptance to my dear friend, Lorrie. She is like a second mother to me. She has taught me so much about growing through the pain and accepting myself regardless of others' opinions. She is always so positive and witty. This woman is the most amazing person I've ever met. When I need advice about life, school or love, I know I can always get the most honest advice from her. She may never realize how much she has impacted my life and I'm beyond thankful for her friendship.

When I think about my life, I think about all these amazing people in it. I wouldn't be the person I am today without them. It's very comforting to know I have so many people I can call on when life gets tough or to share the joy. It's so easy to stay positive about life when I have been blessed beyond measure. Life is good, school is almost finished, and good times are to be had. Damn, I'm one lucky girl!

Until next time, it's just the two of us..